August 11, 2009

Calgon ... Take Me Away!

Monday, August 10th

Went to work against my will and better judgement. I picked up a croissant and cup of coffee on the way to work to make myself feel better, washed my hands and sat at my desk ready to work.

Until the phone rang. And the cord went around my coffee cup, picked it up and threw it at me. Coffee down pants, on shirt front and spilled on cloth chair. And the call? "Please come up front to get your client". [Insert expletives here]. I cleaned up as best and fast as I could, but I reeked of coffee.

During the course of the morning I did some paperwork and didn't notice the HUGE ink blotch on the palm of my hand until I went to scratch my face. Looked at hand, looked down at my pants and guess what? Yep. Ink.

At this point, I'm hating my job, my life and Mondays.

Now I'm walking around my office with coffee and ink stains on my clothes feeling like I'm being eyeballed and pegged a slob, but I've got this expression on my face that says, 'Hey, before you say something - don't say anything!" (aka my ugly face). The day is still young.

Lunchtime. Can you say egg roll? Now, can you say soy sauce? Front and center of shirt. Ink, soy sauce and coffee.

How about I leave work early at 6:40p which gets me home at 9:10p, go home, shower, sleep and start over?

That would have worked, BUT there was a summons in my mailbox. I have jury duty in 2 weeks. How is that possible? When I postponed last time (the last two times, in fact) the clerk asked me when I wanted to postpone until, and I'm sure I was used my best and clearest voice when I said NEVER. So why is there a summons in my mailbox?

OK, it'll be better in the morning.

Tuesday, August 11

I'm going to be in a good mood, so I put on my best Spring/Summer outfit (sundress with a white jacket - linen) headed to work. Made it past the coffee, made it past the exploding pens, and absolutely NO soy sauce today.

Went to get soup for lunch. Fast. Simple. Safe. Got upstairs to my desk and my white jacket is wet. Wet?

The soup is about 4 inches in from the edge, and the counter is speckled. So I didn't see the soup spilled on the counter. Apparently my white jacket soaked it up. And turned it yellow. Chicken noodle, perhaps.

And what's that smell? chicken? or noodle? and the stain on my dress where my belly button is - beef chili soup.

How about I go home early tonight, get to sleep early and start over tomorrow?


  1. I can't wait to read about your next day! :o)

  2. Oh-My-Lanta!
    I had to check the's only Tuesday. Please, please, call in laundry tomorrow, if at all possible :O On the bright side, jury duty often equals KNITTING time! Yay! Go on and serve your country with crafty flair and a dpn in your hair. Si se puede!